Wtf: This is why he's my bro...

[black_sluggard]

Because less than twenty minutes after I write this rambling piece of shit, he managed to cheer me up with this:

---

(Talking about his new job.)

"Zeretal" 10:26 pm: Also, I have 35 dollars in ones.

Hazgarn 10:26 pm: Tips? Or you get a second job you hadn't told me about? >.>

Hazgarn 10:26 pm: Aaaaaand that's really not an image I needed in my head. Jesus...

"Zeretal" 10:39 pm: Tips.

"Zeretal" 10:39 pm: I made.. total, between what I had left over from last night (I bought lunch, and paid 15 bucks for stuffed grapeleaves and a mousse that lied to me)

"Zeretal" 10:39 pm: 70 bucks.

"Zeretal" 10:39 pm: Tonight alone, I made 60.

Hazgarn 10:44 pm: Is it bad that I want my new threat to be "Be nice to me or I will write a male stripper based on you into one of my fics!!!"? >.>

"Zeretal" 10:44 pm:  ...

"Zeretal" 10:44 pm: I'd kill you.

"Zeretal" 10:44 pm: Besides, I don't have a body to be a stripper.

Hazgarn 10:45 pm: Even if he was a straight male stripper? With a heart of gold. Who gives most of his tips to people advocating...I don't know. Bunnies.

"Zeretal" 10:45 pm: Male strippers need to be buff and pretty. With perfect teeth, and 6-pack abs.

Hazgarn 10:45 pm: (I don't even know wtf I'd do with a male stripper character.)

Hazgarn 10:45 pm: (Okay, apparently the answer my brain immediately throws out is: murder suspect).

"Zeretal" 10:46 pm: rofl

Hazgarn 10:46 pm: Especially if he is like this dorky nice guy.

Hazgarn 10:46 pm:  lol

Hazgarn 10:46 pm::  I'm not writing this, don't worry.

"Zeretal" 10:46 pm: "Bud, I just do this for the money. I never said I enjoyed it."

Hazgarn 10:46 pm: (Unless I do.)

"Zeretal" 10:47 pm: "I used to be a waiter, then I took an arrow to the knee."

Hazgarn 10:47 pm: Ow. I literally threw my head back so hard laughing at that that it hurt...

"Zeretal" 10:47 pm: XD

"Zeretal" 10:48 pm: "We get gay guys in here every once in a while.." *peers.* "Infact, haven't I seen you before?"

Hazgarn 10:48 pm: rofl Don't... you might make it happen.

"Zeretal" 10:49 pm: "No. And you're going off subject." *scoff, eyeroll* "Whatever man, but I can smell gay guys from a mile away, part of the business."

Hazgarn 10:50 pm: I'm already picturing some scene of Javier/Kevin or Lohen/Santos interrogating the nice guy bunny stripper...

"Zeretal" 10:50 pm: *sigh* Just do it. You know you want too, just don't name him any sort of variation of my name.

---

So yeah. There was more "meaningful" and "supportive" stuff earlier in the conversation, but honestly this was what managed to do the trick for me.

And if that fic ever happens, now you know who to blame.