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(Fic) Black Edelweiss—Chapter Twenty-Three: Parabola
Title: Black Edelweiss
Series: Zeitgeist
Follows: One Giant Leap
Wordcount: 2,513
Summary: Two weeks after Claire Bennet's televised leap from the Ferris wheel, the 12th handles it's first case delving into the strange world of specials. Evidence points the investigation toward a former Company Agent, a man Noah Bennet would swear up and down doesn't exist.
Details: Minimal details due to inflation. Full warnings and details in main post.
PREV: Chapter Twenty-Two // MAIN // NEXT: Interlude 19
Recap: In Baltimore, Konrad and Javier paid a visit to Konrad's eldest son, Martin Gray. Martin confirmed Adam's news of Samson's cancer, and agreed to give them his brother's location, but declared himself through with Konrad and the rest of his family.
Chapter Twenty-Three: Parabola
And if the pain was gone
And you were free to run away
And get out
Would you get out of there
Or do you really care
It's not safe or easy
And maybe when you're gone
You just won't belong at all
—Black Sabbath, "Sins of the Father"
Javier finally gave in and decided that sanity was overrated. He and Konrad both needed a chance to recover after their encounter with Martin. And, after all the not-sleep he had managed to get over the two nights his partner had already been locked away behind Konrad's personality, Javier also needed caffeine like breathing. After Kate's next check-in Javier left his phone on the charger in the car and managed to find a small diner that not only opened before five, but was also blessedly empty.
They took a booth by the front window, and Konrad turned to stare out at the still-dark street outside with a distant, occupied expression.
A strange mood had fallen over the immortal after they had left the Inner Harbor, leaving him listless and distracted. Somehow, Javier found this growing despondency more disturbing than anything else that Konrad had said or done. Though he failed to understand that, at first, after a moment's examination Javier finally managed to figure out why.
Largely, the most painful elements of Javier's interactions with Konrad had been the things that reminded him of his partner. Gestures, tones, and habits that were painful in their familiarity—things that still felt like Kevin, even though in his mind Javier knew it wasn't him. By contrast this dull, vacant distress was something completely alien to Javier's experience. And vacant really was the only word for it. As troubling as it had been seeing his partner's body inhabited by someone else, seeing Konrad's presence within that body dimmed almost to the point of absence was far worse.
The image that thought conjured in his mind—of his partner as an empty vessel, drained of animation and spirit—made Javier's skin crawl, but short of shaking the man he was at a loss for what to do about it.
Konrad seemed almost completely oblivious to what was going on around him. He made no reaction to the approach of the waitress, and no comment as Javier ordered. Though he did finally—thankfully—begin to snap out of it once their cups were filled, and by the time the food was pushed in front of them, Konrad was aware enough to look up from his plate with a soft, startled surprise. Javier pretended not to notice, focusing on his eggs and his coffee. Konrad opened his mouth as if to say something, but he must have seen the warning in Javier's face the one time their eyes met, because he apparently thought better of it.
And Javier also pretended not to see Konrad's very faint smile as the immortal tucked into his waffles in silence.
Approaching the hospital, Konrad's demeanor was very different from what Javier had seen before visiting Martin. He was still visibly hesitant, his apprehension almost palpable, however it felt far less anxious than it did resigned. In an odd way, it brought to mind the barely hidden dread Javier had last seen on his partner's face when he had left Kevin sitting alone in that interrogation room. It was the expression of a man being forced to confront something that threatened to crush his very soul—
A man with no hope of escape from what lay ahead of him, yet no choice but to move forward to meet it.
As tense as Konrad already was, once they passed through the doors his posture became even more stiff and his energy more unsettled. He was pale-faced, and seemed a bit shaky. Those details itched for a moment with elusive familiarity, and Javier felt a sharp twist in his gut as he realized why.
Kevin had always hated hospitals...
Javier swallowed thickly as his mind returned once again to the accounts of Konrad's past. If anything was goddamned sure, Javier knew he was never going to tease his partner about those phobias again.
The nurse at the front desk greeted them with a warm smile as they came in...though that expression cooled slightly once she got a closer look. Javier supposed he should have seen that coming. Between bruises, bullets, exhaustion and general distress, neither he nor Konrad were looking their friendliest at this point.
"Can I help you?" she asked them, a wary uncertainty audible in her voice.
"My name is Gabriel Gray," Konrad told her, the lie coming easily despite the man's unease. "I'm here to visit my uncle, Samson."
The name impacted Javier's awareness, arousing a sharp jolt of shock he very nearly couldn't keep hidden. Though he tried to remind himself of the possibly of coincidence, Javier had a very hard time making himself truly believe it.
Of all the names Konrad might have chosen...
Javier found himself thinking back to the notes that he had made about his first trip to the future back in June. The Gabriel of which Kevin had spoken then had clearly held some kind of importance, not just to his partner and to Agent DiNozzo, but to Noah Bennet as well. From what he had come to see of Bennet during this case, Javier felt the man was likely many things—shifty, calculating and ruthless being chief among them—yet as much as Javier disliked the man, Bennet had struck him as immanently rational.
And, if what Javier had learned about the Company revealed anything, almost preternaturally open-minded.
The notion of anything—any person—rendering Noah Bennet "unreasonable" as Kevin and DiNozzo had claimed felt sufficiently out of character that it could absolutely not be taken lightly. Yet Javier had seen Bennet's reaction to the man Peter had brought with him to the station. He found it almost impossible to believe that the "Gabriel" his partner had mentioned in Washington could possibly have been anyone else.
While Javier had never gotten the chance to learn the specifics, Gabriel had clearly struck up some kind of rapport with Kevin at the station. It was entirely possible that had been enough to cement whatever connection the two would have to each other in the future. Nothing in Konrad's file had hinted toward a connection between the two, and it was certainly possible the choice of name was unrelated.
Then again, nothing in Konrad's file had hinted at a family, either.
It was useless to speculate idly, Javier finally decided. Any possible connection to the future needed to be looked at, he had already decided that the night Bennet's daughter had thrown everything into the spotlight. But, at the moment, Javier didn't have the time, energy or resources to pursue the possible lead. He was already exhausted, overtaxed emotionally, and dangerously close to a crash. He needed to stay focused.
Getting Kevin back was the priority. Anything else would have to wait.
As if to prove his concerns about splitting his attention, Javier abruptly realized that the nurse was looking at him expectantly. He realized stupidly that she was probably wondering why he was there. Caught off guard, Javier tried to pull together something to say which fit Konrad's story, but he came up unfortunately blank—
Javier would have to blame his daze for his lack of reaction when Konrad slung one arm possessively around his waist.
"This is my partner, Javier," Konrad told her, inflecting the word significantly with a tone that made Javier's stomach twist.
It took every ounce of composure Javier had left in him not to pull himself out of Konrad's grasp. The nurse looked them over uncertainly, biting her lip for a moment before turning to lead the way.
Though Javier knew that Martin was the older brother, looking at Samson, he never would have guessed it. The man lying in the bed seemed impossibly frail to Javier. His skin was ashen, his cheeks hollow, grey strands washing out his hair and beard until both were unidentifiably colorless. Even his eyes, a muddy hazel, seemed oddly leeched of color. Looking at him, Javier found he couldn't make out much of a resemblance between the dying man and his partner. It hurt him to imagine that there might have been at one time.
With his body looking so wasted and used, it took Javier several moments to even realize that Samson was awake.
"Dad?" Samson's voice was harsh and dry, barely a whisper as he stirred in recognition. "Martin said he wouldn't look for you. We weren't even sure you were still alive..."
"I'm sorry," the nurse said to them in a low aside. "The medicine he's on can make him confused."
"No, it's okay," Konrad told her quietly, his voice tight. "Could— Could we have a moment alone?"
After a quiet moment of debate with himself Javier swallowed his misgivings and retreated to the hallway without argument. He knew it was a bad idea, but standing there he felt too much like he was intruding. Still, Javier wasn't about to let Konrad out of his sight again—neither his heart nor his sanity could handle another disappearing act—so he stood against the far wall, watching them through the open doorway. Though he could see the other men easily it left the two of them room enough to talk in private. The nurse followed, but when Javier didn't move any farther, she didn't either. She cast an askance look upon his face. Belatedly, he was reminded once more of the bruises.
"I ran into the door," Javier told her, flatly.
Either she missed his irony, or she failed to appreciate the joke. She seemed decidedly uncomfortable when she left.
(—
=)
"Sam..."
Konrad's throat felt painfully tight, and though Detective Esposito and the nurse had backed off, for a moment the name was all that he could manage. What could he say after fifty years—after Samson had lived a whole life without him?
The silence hung between them, heavy and expectant, yet so complete and fragile that, when he finally spoke, Samson's rough, trembling voice shattered it completely.
"It wouldn't save me, would it?" Samson asked him, eyes roaming over Konrad's features with a weary and resigned expression. "If I could...take what you have. It wouldn't fix what's wrong with me."
Konrad shook his head. The Company had done more than its share of research on Konrad's acquired abilities during his time with them. Though Adam's ability had shielded him from aging and sickness all these years, with a cancer like Samson's that had already deeply taken root, the accelerated growth of cells could only make the condition monstrously worse.
"No," Konrad told him, the word barely making it past his lips. "I'm sorry. I wish—"
Konrad had wished a lot of things in his life. So many things over the years that he had often wished, more than anything else, that he could stop. Sometimes he feared that if he held onto each one of his regrets that, one day, they would be all he had left. But wishing was a very human thing to do...
Whatever else he was, Konrad had never stopped being that.
"I wish there were something I could do," he said, hopelessly. "I wish I hadn't let your mother push me out of your life. If I'd made the effort, if I'd just been there, maybe I could have helped you. Maybe I could have stopped you from—"
Konrad fell silent again. He couldn't imagine any setting where it would have been appropriate to drag Samson's crimes in front of him—Konrad hadn't even managed it when they had been fresh in his mind. To speak of them here struck him as cruel. Samson was already suffering—he was dying. And Konrad wasn't even sure why that should have changed anything, but that didn't change the fact that apparently it did.
"You know, then," Samson said, with a faint, pained note of acceptance. "You know about what I've done."
Konrad nodded weakly.
"I'm sorry," Konrad said again, quietly. "God, Sam, I am so sorry."
Samson shook his head.
"They aren't your crimes to regret," Samson told him. He let out a desiccated noise, something between a laugh and a sigh. "Though I guess you have your own share."
Konrad couldn't hold back a rueful smile.
"More than even my lifetime should have had time for," Konrad admitted with painful honesty. "Some of them much worse. And if I had been in your life, Sam, or if I'd stopped you after, once I knew..."
Konrad stopped, taking a breath to loosen the tension that had built up in his chest.
"Some of that blood is on my hands," he said finally, shaking his head.
"I can't say I haven't made the same mistakes," Samson confessed with a wounded smile. "Though you probably know about that, too."
"Your son," Konrad said. "Gabriel."
It wasn't a question, but Samson nodded in confirmation nonetheless.
"I came to see him once, when he was a kid. Martin wouldn't remember it..." Konrad trailed off, shaking his head with a sigh. "Then once more when he was grown. I... I'd thought about trying to build a place for myself as part of his life—maybe as a friend, or a neighbor. Trying to do right for him the way I failed to with you. But...it never got to happen. And now I've lost track of him..."
"He came to visit me last year," Samson said, eyes distant, his lips pulled into a wry expression that could hardly be called a smile. "He came wanting to kill me for what I did to him and to his mother. And I tried to kill him."
He huffed a breathless laugh, then, eyes turning to meet Konrad's with a weary, bitter tone of regret.
"Like father like son..." Samson said, shaking his head almost disbelievingly. The words made Konrad ache to his very core. "We hunted a lot of the same trails it turns out, and he had acquired an ability like yours... But you say it wouldn't have saved my life if I had taken it... Which means that I threw away the only chance I was ever going to have at being forgiven. That I threw it away for nothing."
Samson shut his eyes, pausing to catch his breath. He opened them moments later, gesturing Konrad closer and taking his hand.
"Forgiving you might be the only thing it's still in my power to do," Samson told him, squeezing Konrad's hand with what little strength he had. "I would have to be a bigger fool than I am to throw a chance at that away as well."
Konrad's chest was tight, robbing him of his breath and preventing any sort of response, so instead he returned his son's grip in silence. Looking at that hand, weak and thin and pale, Konrad couldn't help but reflect painfully on the first day he had held it. Tiny then, pink and warm, and so strong that it had amazed him, Konrad had been filled with so much hope for his son's life...
A faint sound drew his attention back to the present, and Konrad looked up to see Samson looking at him sharply, almost as if he were only now really seeing him.
"And maybe," Samson said, slowly, and carefully, his voice was as dry and as fragile as a leaf, "there might be one last thing you can do for me..."
And though his heart dropped with dread anticipation of the request, Konrad knew that whatever it was he would do it—
If Samson asked him to commit murder right now, Konrad knew wouldn't be able to say no.
PREV: Chapter Twenty-Two // MAIN // NEXT: Interlude 19
Author's Note: So, this chapter took me a ridiculously long time to finish. There were probably a number of reasons for that, but mostly the fear that the scene between Konrad and Samson would come off as a cliché. I'm still not sure how IC Samson is in this scene. He didn't seem very remorseful during Sylar's visit. But then these are very different circumstances. So... I don't know.
Anyway, here's a little bit of meta-trivia:
Heroes fans probably recognize the reference I'm pulling with the waffles, as they are a recurring detail in the series, especially with Hiro. However, this also ties in to Castle through Kevin's blog, The Ryan Report.
The Ryan Report entry on "When the Bough Breaks" had a lot of influence on the part of Interlude 9 describing Konrad's arrival in, and easy infatuation with, New York City. Rereading the entry, I noticed a section (which would also be the part about the waffles, of course), that I couldn't help but find intriguing in hindsight:
"Me, I have a special fondness for Belgian waffles, especially after midnight. And in classic New York style, there's a stand down on Fulton Street that serves 'em twenty-four hours a day. Now, I'm pretty sure the ancient French dude who works there hates me—he pretends to not ever remember me and I pretend not to notice. But, hey, the fact that I can get a Belgian waffle at 2:00 AM from an angry Frenchman? That's what makes this city great!"
Needless to say, ordering waffles to make a Nazi smile is just another one of those hyper-surreal experiences that Javier will probably carry with him to his grave.
no subject
I love the tie-in to the Ghost you mention in the Author's Notes! That's so cool!
Thank you so much for continuing this. I look forward to reading more.
no subject
Yeah, that was my own rationale with Samson pretty much, but I'm trying to break my habit of explaining every goddamned piece of meta in my Author's Notes, which are all too often friggin' huge anyway...
The blog entry was kind of weird. I didn't even remember that line until I went back to reread it while working on this chapter. And technically Kevin wouldn't have had to deal with the Ghost's ability since they all went offline after Konrad broke, but it was too good to pass up. So maybe Konrad was the one to find the place initially, and Kevin visited afterward and thought the guy was just being rude.
(As a totally random aside, that specific post has been a large part of Kevin's characterization in just about every fic I write him in, to the point of joking on multiple occasions that I ship Kevin Ryan/New York City.
It also, once, resulted in a story where he was a fairytale mouse...)