black_sluggard | Wtf: I want to write ALL the porn...and a Big Bang tie-in? (Reply)

Circa September of last year, I never would have imagined I could ever write anything more explicit than Evidence to the Contrary (and yes, I'm aware that fic is tame as hell). Then Quality of Life happened.

Now, I'm aware QOL isn't all that graphic either. Despite the hefty dose of kink it's still probably just this side of even needing the NC-17 rating I slapped on it. It's funny what taking one element out of the equation can apparently do to a demented muse, though. In this case the element is a heartbeat. To put it bluntly, in the Life series my canon is that post-vitals can't get a full erection. It's a simple mechanical issue. As a consequence, there are more than a few acts that it would be physically impossible for zombie!Javier to engage in.

And, as a related consequence, somehow that makes my brain want to write everything he could still do...

I blame the tagging system on AO3, really. So many things I didn't even realize were things until I had to start looking them up to know if I'd even want to read the fic I was looking at at the time. And honestly, a lot of the things I'm contemplating having these boys do aren't even things I personally find very sexy...but I kinda want to do them anyway. Apparently the Life 'verse is threatening to turn into my own personal kinkbingo card...

So, yeah.

Moving on, but still related to Life, I've wanted to see other fandoms brought into this 'verse for a while now. I want to know if the BAU has ever dealt with a post-vital unsub. I want to write about how post-vitals are almost unheard of in Hawaii, and how when a case involving them crops up in Oahu, everyone bows to Danno's experience (even before they learn the truth behind his and Rachel's divorce). I want House fic where a patient that's been post-vital for years suddenly comes in with tachycardia. I want a big weepy team!fic where Tony comes out of onset with dissociative amnesia and Gibbs is silently supportive, and Abby gives great big hugs (and I answer the question that's been bugging me about whether goths even exist in this 'verse). Hell, I even want to write post-vitals into The Walking Dead, and that doesn't even begin to make sense...

I want all these things that I'm never going to have the time to write. Actually, I want these things whether I actually write them or not. I have all these ideas though, but guess which one my brain wants to play with the most?

A freaking sitcom.

Yeah, the one Life 'verse bunny that seems to want to bear any fruit is a tie-in to The Big Bang Theory. Don't ask me how that even happened. Probably has something to do with Leonard's position as the universe's buttmonkey. That and imagining how hilarious Sheldon's backward reactions to pretty much everything could be when you throw zombies into the equation. I mean, after onset post-vitals can't even carry most diseases.

Given a choice between a roommate with occasional cannibalistic tendencies and one who's going to bring the flu home, we all know which one Sheldon's going to pick...

Another plus for this whole concept (for me) would be having characters for whom spouting random facts about how IHN works is actually in character. Between Amy and Bernadette, I've pretty much got my bases covered. And Raj and Howard would be hilariously tactless and unhelpful, even if they kind of sort of mean to be supportive. And Leonard's mother... God, don't even get me started.

It's all so freaking tempting...

So yeah. Sitcom angst, porn, sitcom angst, porn... Decisions.

What I really want to do is dump it all on a shelf and finish my WIPs, but...yeah. Odds are I'll end up writing the porn.