(Wtf) My "To-Not-Do" List (also general journal stuff)

[black_sluggard]

My new years resolution to manage a to-do list has so far failed. So, instead here is a list of things I intend not to do in the near future:

• Open up five to ten fics to "work" on, while spending my time too split to focus on any one of them. Gonna try to keep it to three or less. Priority give to priority fics, generally, but I'm going to try to focus on the almosthumanbang fic and "Five Years Gone".


• Make a second dive through the existing archive of "Welcome to Night Vale" fanfic and/or reread the ones I have bookmarked. Ideally, no more Night Vale fic until I actually caught up with the podcast. I think I've only got seven or so left to listen to anyway.


• Read my lips: No. New. Fandoms.


• Play Assassin's Creed: Black Flag and pretend it's "research" for the nautical D&D campaign I'm planning to run for my friend, Z.


• Focus too much on said D&D game, said friend being currently occupied with an upcoming theater performance and his obsession with the Ravenloft-themed Neverwinter Nights server "Prisoners of the Mist". (Why did I ever introduce him to Ravenloft? Gods, why...?)


• Especially want to stay away from diving into my books looking for ideas and planning ahead for a long campaign. This is going to be a solo game. With a rogue. Who is squishy. If he never manages to leave the island he washes up on, or if we wind up dropping the campaign like we have in the past, I will have wasted so much time...


• Spend money or ask others to spend money so that I can play "Prisoners of the Mists" with Z. Especially when almosthumanbang is looming and I am painfully behind.


• With thoughts of D&D and Ravenloft specifically filling my head again, it might be particularly tempting to start thinking about that fanfic again. You know, that one where Kevin, Javi, Kate and Castle all wind up snatched by the Dark Powers to become prisoners of the Mists themselves? As sexy as it might be to picture Castle putting his fencing skills to proper use or hear Javi grouse about primitive firearms, the last thing I need to do is launch into yet another story. The Realm of Dread isn't going anywhere. Their weekend in hell can certainly wait.


• Mapmaking. Goes with the whole D&D thing, mainly, but I've lost too many hours on fussing with maps in GIMP, and those are hours that could be used for other things.


• Graphics in general. At least without good reason. The graphics I've committed to do for almosthumanbang, obviously, count as a good reason. Technically, graphics that are meant to accompany my own fic is a "good reason" too, but since I've done quite a few graphics for stories I've yet to actually finish writing, they just sit around and collect virtual dust, so that's not really a productive use of time. That thing I need not to do.

I've been horribly scattered lately. Real life is super stressful right now. Last Tuesday (the 5th? I think? EDIT Jul 1st: It was probably the 25th) my dad had to be taken to the hospital for treatment of what turned out to be a gastrointestinal bleed. He stayed in the hospital for several days while he recovered from losing nearly half of his blood volume into his stomach.

This event also forced him to quit drinking entirely. He's tried to cut back several times in the past, but he's experienced a lot of anxiety about the difficulty of the detox stage. Not unreasonably. Alcohol withdrawal is one of the few that can kill you, and it may have been a significant contributing factor to the stroke he suffered several years back. But he made it through the physical detox stage mostly while in the hospital, under sedation. With that out of the way it's really the behavioral addiction that's going to matter (he's been drinking since he was fourteen). That's going to be about as fun as a bag of kittens (a literal bag literally stuffed full of crying, terrified kittens), but I'm pretty intent on helping him through it.

Of course, nothing ever being simple, the stress of the whole situation with my father has had its effect on my mom's blood pressure. And she wound up having to go to the hospital just the night before last due to shortness of breath. They kept her over two nights to monitor her blood pressure, and she should be coming home later today.

It's been scary and frustrating dealing with my dad alone, because my mom is the one with all the information about his doctors and his coverage, and I've been worried as hell that if something went wrong (he's on new medication, what if I'm missing side effects, things like that). I don't have a car or a driver's license. I don't have any money. I don't know where my dad's card with his money on it is, and even if I did I don't know the PIN. And if anything does go wrong, I've got a short list of dubiously available contacts to fall back on.

When my mom gets back I'm going to have to talk to her about this. I hate not knowing what to do. I feel like people expect me to know, and when I don't that makes me feel so useless.

So, um...I guess that's one item for a To Do list.

Comments

[game-byrd.livejournal.com]

I support you in your list of things you're not going to do!