black_sluggard | Wtf: "Are you going to start from perineum?"

Earlier today, my aunt Adrienne was looking over the warnings on the back of a waxing product (which is apparently not for use on children or the elderly, or on the underarms, face, genitalia, or perineum) all pretty much falling under the heading of DO NOT WANT. My mom and Adrienne made some questionable jokes about waxing the elderly against their will.
Me: "I'm sorry, my brain's still stuck on 'perineum'."
My sister's boyfriend Josh was confused, and asked what the perineum was, which if you don't know is the little spot between your asshole and whatever your front bits happen to be. Then Josh uttered this scarring sentence:
"Oh, you mean that part my baby loves."

Which...things are pretty laid back in my house, but that's not the kind of thing it's even remotely cool to talk about in front of your girlfriend's sister and mom. That just takes TMI to a whole new level.

It turned out later he'd misunderstood me, as the topic of perineal waxing came back up later (because, really, how could it not?), and Kenna had to be provided with the context of the earlier conversation.

It happened when Kenna asked Josh for the name of a friend of his she'd met, and Josh answered it (I thought) strangely.
Josh: "Why, you want to jump his bones?"
Which almost cheesed me off, because I trigger a bit on the idea of my sister ending up in a controlling relationship. But, as Kenna's reply thankfully clarified, I had misunderstood.
Kenna: "Well, I wasn't thinking of that, but yeah sure, maybe."
Me: "Oh, have you guys been having the swinger conversation?"
Kenna: "Something like that."

And I don't know what it says about any of us that I even picked up on that from the exchange, but anyway...

Josh is going to be going off to another part of the state to work with the Conservation Corps some time soon, and when my sister graduates from the Art Institute, she and her friend Renee are going to be going to Florida to attend the Ewald Notter School of Pastry (or as Josh calls it, "Hogwart's School of Baking and Wizardry"). Kenna and he have agreed on an open relationship when that happens.
Josh: "She wants to get her booty on, quote unquote."
Me: "Oh, is that a direct quote?"
Kenna: "No, my direct quote was 'I'm gonna need some cock.'"

I then asked for permission to post it here, because I'm not a total bitch. My sister's response was:
"Are you going to start from perineum?"
Me: "Sure. Why not."

This was followed by a conversation about Kenna's upcoming A La Carte cuisine class, which is apparently critically lacking in pastry students, so she is going to be much in demand. Josh interpreted this in a brief performance that due to shared nerd experience translated itself directly into memeface in my head:

*ditzy looking face with "female" hair* le me in a la carte class
*teary over-excited face* you're from baking and pastry?!?!
*melodramatic shaded face of death* get on the line!!
*stick figure posing like a boss* fuck yeah