Wtf: I'm caught in a "poor me" moment...

[black_sluggard]

This is me being childish and whiny. Really, you're probably better off skipping this.

I want to start this out by saying that I'm aware of how pathetic this is. And petty, and stupid. But I've been depressed as hell lately, because I've been getting a ton of stuff written (which basically usually results in the opposite of depressed), and I don't feel like anyone's been reading my fics. T_T

It's one of those things where logical thought doesn't really fix the problem. Because I know that a. the pairing that I write for is kind of marginal on its own, b. while I write prolifically within that marginal pairing, my stories are often painfully off-genre for the fandom, and c. most of the friends/commenters I've been missing are busy with real life stuff that I'm actually perfectly aware of.

Still, it's just frustrating seeing a new writer enter the fandom and get comments from people I haven't heard from in over a year because *gasp* they manage to write Castle stories without werewolves/zombies/aliens/Nazis/angels/timetravel in them.

In other words, yes, this is me being totally jealous of another writer and not even trying to hide it.

*sigh*

(Though really I'm totally jazzed that there's another voice for the pairing now, because seriously, Kevin and Javier need it.)

Comments

[game-byrd.livejournal.com]

I totally get you. heroes_faves, a couple weeks ago, made a post asking people about what they thought of the state of the fandom and I tracked it for a while ... long enough to see four different people say they were either overwhelmed by the degree of Petlar, that all that was left active in the fandom was Petlar, or that they didn't like Petlar and therefore didn't see a place for themselves in the fandom anymore.

I was looking at my masterlist the other day and ... yeah, when I ran the numbers on word count, 90% of it is Petlar. That's around 1.75 million words of Petlar. But I've still got lots more Petlar I want to write!

I was very frustrated and quit tracking that thread. Didn't help that the mod of heroes_faves (jackvelvet) also doesn't like Petlar (or me) and was making these snide little comments back.

I love your writing, by the way, and totally intend to get more of it as soon as I can.